Monday, April 20, 2015

Dear Black Man

#DearBlackMan yesterday I found myself sharing a secret all black women know. I don't know what came over me to say such a thing to a non-black-woman. I told this fellow sister-who-cant-get-a-tan (this is just to make you laugh Samantha), that, no black woman lives in fear of wondering whether you #DBM like her or not. In fact she is always sure that of course you like her since you give her very little reason to believe otherwise. Of course, the-sister-who-cant-get-a-tan, could not believe this.

I told her the question is never does he like her, the question is does she like him? Black women spend their days ducking from the calls of adoration from the #DearBlackMan.

This was after yet another unsuccessful solo time I tried to have the other night, the #DearBlackMan thought it is yet again, just his moment, of course. Well, there is a huge downside as you can imagine even though other male species have been said to need a drink before they can boldly say things to a woman.

The #DearBlackMan is rather overly confident of himself, which also translates into the dear black woman's overconfidence about her demand. Which is a dangerous situation for everyone. Good innocent #DearBlackMen who are not trying to do the same are unfortunately at first most likely to be painted with the same brush. Poor good man, suffering once more.

Also, the dear black man because of his overconfidence and sport of picking up women at will, may end up with several women at the same time. Which is just wrong.
Second, this also feeds in the black woman's insecurity of being willing to take a man who is already taken just because he offers himself to her as though he did not have two other girl friends.

I have heard too many black women accept the unacceptable. I would even say that our black woman feed this monster. It is no surprise that the two crimes we have witnessed of late are two black young men who have wives, yet have known girlfriends. Of course not all men are like this. To say that would be to betray the very point of #DearBlackMan.

The other problem is of course to produce very skeptical black woman like myself who simply refuses to be outsmarted by the well practiced charms of the #dearblackman. Unfair to some, but fair to a lot. I hope I have not betrayed the sisterhood here.

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